As an attorney I would have figured you would be able to sniff out those hyperboles by now!
How's this for an actual response from a customer:
Spencer,
Sorry for these invoices not being paid. In May we experianced two incidents of vandalism & theft in our offices. We surmised that it apparently was someone who had worked with us in the past. My accounting dept was disrupted to the point that we could not tell what was taken & what was destroyed. The worst part is that I have no idea who would have done such an act. (a sledge hammer to your office suites is not a pretty picture) Anyone who has worked with me will tell you that I am to a fault, fair & at times overly generous. All said your invoices must have been with the untold many that were discarded. Shortly there after I decided to give the Title business to XXXXXX. She had done a fantastic job & this aspect of our business is not where I want to direct our companies attention.
I hope you will understand & will have you out a check today.
Thanks,
XXXXX XXXXX
Apparently unpaid invoices are bringing a hefty price on the black market. Or the cleanup went something like this:
"Here's some invoices to Race Enterprises, whadya wanna do with 'em?"
"Eh....discard 'em"
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