LOL - that was really funny Robert!  Any hoot, if you can't afford to hire someone to pay the bills how in the heck is there any hope for the rest of us!  Your last statement sounds like my kids when they were younger when I told them we don't have the money right now - they responded "well Mom you have checks don't you!"  They just couldn't get my repeated response that I had to put money in the bank first for the checks to work lol!